If Wishes Were Fishes
by Sasha Vane
Summary: Sometimes, things from your childhood return to bite you on the butt . . . Or, in this case, tackle you to a wall and remind you of something that Link would really have rather left forgotten... (One-shot)


_A/N: More one-shots! Whoo! I'm on a roll!_

_. . . Because this one-shot had to be done. Heh. _

_And because who _doesn't_ want to torment Link further?_

_Note: This is really more of a crackfic than anything, but it's loved all the same._

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There were several things in Hyrule that Link found to be surprisingly easy to cope with: Zelda's capture and subsequent disappearance, the sudden increase of temples and sages popping up all over the place, and a talking owl that somehow was strong enough to carry Link wherever he wanted to go—but never bothered to do so unless the owl was being especially impatient and obnoxious.

Obviously Link wasn't _happy_, but he was coping rather well, given how rapidly he'd somehow managed to age.

_This_, however, was most definitely _not_ something Link was coping with, by any stretch of the imagination.

Ruto was a sage, Ruto had given him her engagement stone and medallion . . . and Ruto had somehow managed to corner him the minute he'd tried to leave the blasted water temple with said medallion.

Literally.

The Zora princess had all but tackled him straight into the wall, and then attached herself to him in a way he was sure only a Zora could—with her legs and arms plastered around him and her various fins poking random places on his body. With the wall behind him and the princess pressing him against it, Link really had no where he could run.

Not unless, that is, he decided to openly harm one of the seven sages—and he had no idea if _that_ was even possible to begin with.

"Do you remember?" she breathed in his ear, and he instantly shuddered at the feeling. "I gave you my precious mother's stone and waited for you, Link. I waited so long, but you never came back. I thought maybe you forgot about me, about our promise . . . " She sniffed and then a moment later snuggled even closer to him. "But you came back! I knew you'd remember."

What was he supposed to say? What was he supposed to _do_?

The princess had a chokehold on his neck just moments after announcing that she'd expected him to keep a "promise" they'd made—and he had no idea what, exactly, that promise was—but earlier she'd spoken to him as a Sage, as if that promise had been made void.

What had changed her mind . . . ? And how could he try to redirect her attention back to that?

"I know you have your quest, Link, but I wanted you to know that I'll be waiting for you when you finish it. I have my duties as a Sage, and you have yours as the Hero of Time but . . . I just can't give you up. I made a promise to you first!" She pulled back just enough to wink at him before tucking her head right back under his chin.

Her sudden moments threw his weight of balance and he found himself leaning even more on the wall for support as his arms came around Ruto to keep both of them from tumbling to the ground.

"I knew you'd accept me!" she shouted happily, and began nuzzling his neck and chest with her own head.

He winced as his hesitation lead Ruto to yet another misunderstanding. He half hoped that Navi would have said something to help him out by now, but she just kept flying around muttering about how he needed to hurry up and get to the next temple already.

He opened his mouth to try and say something to change Ruto's mind, but she didn't give him a chance to get a word in edgewise.

"Shh! It's OK! You don't have to say a word!" She ran her hands through what hair she could reach under his blue hat. "I know everything, and I most definitely accept!"

Accept?

What the heck had happened _now_?

Link began to panic, not even noticing until it was too late that the princess' face was moving closer and closer to his own. Before he'd realized it, she was suddenly kissing his lips, sending her tongue into his gaping mouth like a fish diving straight into Lord Jabu-Jabu's mouth.

Link found himself shuddering again, and the princess pulled away to grin at him with the same grin he'd remembered haunting him as a child, when she's sauntered over to him and given him the Spiritual Stone of Water not long ago.

She reached out to caress his face with one hand before gently tweaking his nose.

"Don't worry, my love! I'll be waiting right here, guarding my temple, until you're done with saving Hyrule!" she chirped, waving at him as he turned and all but ran out of the water temple, hoping to escape anything else she might try to do to him.

There was one thing Link decided right then as he ran off.

He was probably never going to be free of Ruto.


End file.
